It's been 3 months already

Dear,

So much has changed since you left 3 months ago.

In the World,
There seems to be more and more natural disasters; earthquakes, tsunamis, nuclear threats…
Seems like the earth itself is degenerating.

In Singapore,
The Singapore election is over and PAP has encountered the worse attack from the oppositions. Even though they won eventually, the results clearly told them that the people are not happy with them. The government is going through quite a big change now. You know, after these changes, I think we might even have a chance to buy the 7-seater we were looking for.
But now, what’s the point in getting a 7-seater. Both family’s are no longer seeing eye-to-eye, so there’ll ever be a chance they’ll both be present to fill up the car.
It’s so stressful standing in between both sides. Were you feeling that way previously?

In office,
There’s a major re-organisation, and I’m placed where I am, for the last 9 years.
As you know, I wanted to moved somewhere else, but at my current state, it’s hard.
Think that since I missed this opportunity, it’s likely I’ll be staying where I am for a long long time. I feel as if I’m standing still while the others walk by me.

At home,
Evan have grown so much.
He can somewhat understand us when we talk.
He can walk somewhat. Can definitely crawl.
He has 6 teeth and sprouting more, making him very cranky.
He’s eating some table food already.
He’s even drinking milk now; but he stopped liking porridge and cereal.
Oh, how I wished you were here to see and share this joy with me.
By myself, every little joy I have is mixed with the pain of knowing you’re not here to share it with me.

Me,
I’ve reverted to the person before I knew you.
Reverted, except that I used to not have this hole in my heart.
Reverted, except when facing Evan.
It’s not a person I like to be, but without you, I’ve no motivation to change.

So much have changed in these 3 months. It felt as if a much longer time have passed.
Yet nothing truly distracted me from the pain of losing you. True that I’m tearing less now, but the pain inside seems to be getting stronger, now that I can’t release it.